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  • Writer's pictureellicemiles

Mind Reading

So, wouldn’t it be useful to be able to read people’s minds? Like, for example if you asked them a question, and they gave you an answer, you could tell if they were being honest or not.

Where did this come from? I hear you ask. Well, not many people know this about me but I have the uncanny ability to read minds. I know, I’m special aren’t I!

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Seriously though, I have struggled for years with anxiety and a big part of it is worrying what people think of me. That’s the downside to being a mind reader you see, you may not always like what interpretation you come up with. In particular, if I choose to raise my children in a certain way or live my life a certain way, then I am bombarded by the disapproving thoughts of my family and friends and well, everyone.

It’s pretty daunting and exhausting being constantly aware of and wanting to control other people’s thinking patterns. You’d think I’d have mastered it by now but the truth is, at times I think it’s more likely the master of me.

My counsellor has given me lots of help with this. I’m starting to realise three problems with mind reading:

1. My ability to mind read is as real as unicorns and pots of gold at the end of rainbows (I know, disappointing).

2. Because of no. 1. I am unable to guarantee any accuracy in my attempts to read other people’s thoughts. I could be right but I could also be wrong.

3. Spending time dwelling on what other people think of me isn’t helpful (who’d have thunk it!).

It’s a hard habit to kick though. My mind has processed in this way for so long that I have to kind of reprogram it or maybe I don’t, maybe I have to accept that this is who I am and just try to make the best of it.

My counsellor (you’re going to hear a lot about her) gave me the idea of asking myself whether particular thoughts are useful. There are a lot of occasions where contemplating the possible thoughts of others could be good. On the other hand if these thoughts are making me anxious then I’d assume their use is limited if existent at all.

Until next time.

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